Not gonna lie - I CANNOT WAIT for the comeback.

Come on Brit! You've already shed 26 pounds so far (Source: US Weekly Oct. 23/06); Only about 35 more to go!!!

Oy vey

1. Monday I am due to start flight attendant boot camp. Our first day consists of running an obstacle course in stilletos pushing a refreshment cart yelling "put your tray and seatback in the upright position". Points are taken off if your pillbox hat falls off. This is all well and good except that I have just been offered a very, very (underline the very) lucrative position at a financial institution that I was previously employed with about 4 years ago.

WHAT THE FUDGE!!!??? Where were all of these job offers 2 months ago when I was pan-handling on Yonge St. and eating donuts out of the dumpster behind the gas station Tim Hortons!!!???

In conclusion, I don't know what to do and the magic 8 ball keeps telling me that things are a little hazy right now and that I should ask again later.

2. I think I want to cut all of my hair off a la Posh Spice.

It's kind of like "Where's Waldo"

More on Montreal Fashion week. This ditty was sent to me by fellow model Karen. See if you can spot my 0.7 seconds of fame.

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My brain hurts.

1. I am being forced into retirement from the fashion industry. I don't blame the powers that be as 25 is, for all intents and purposes, ancient. I am the J. Howard Marshall of the industry and nothing could have made me feel more so than the fact that I lost my place in the opening show of L'Oreal Fashion Week to none other than a girl who had to give her grade 8 teacher a note explaining her absence from school that day.

1.2 As a result, I have decided to make something of myself and am studying for the LSAT. My plan of attack consists of memorizing every strategy in the book and then writing sample test after sample test after sample test. Please note that interspersed between each sample test is a healthy dose of PerezHilton.com - just to keep me sane.

2. That is all.

Montreal gives me the heebee jeebees; a camera phone photo essay

1. Back from Montreal. The show was phenomenal. All 11 minutes of it. I had 2 changes and saw a total of maybe 1 minute of actual time in front of the crowd. Now I loved every second of it, but just to give you some insight:

A 10 minute runway show is a function of: 6 hours driving to Montreal + 2 hours of hair and makeup + 2 hours of waiting backstage multiplied by the fact that call time in Toronto was 6 am. Throw in one stressed out designer and one bitchy publicist into the mix and you get 60 seconds of showtime.

2. This was my view from the makeup chair.


3. Every girls' dream.


4. Backstage.

The sweet part was the craft services table just off to the right of this photo. Since this was a world class fashion event NO ONE was touching it which meant more food for me.

5. Rehersal.


6. In conclusion, I am tired. Satisfied but tired. Montreal is a strange little place and I haven't decided if that is because it is lacking in character or if it exudes too much of it. I think there are photos floating around out there that were not taken with a dirty 1 megapixel phone camera. If I find them, I'll put them up.

7. Toronto Fashion Week starts Monday. Now THAT is fun.

On y go à Montréal

1. T minus 12 hours until Fashion Week madness begins. I take off tomorrow morning for the collections in Montreal and let me tell you how excited I am to spend 5 hours in a van full of sixteen year olds who haven't eaten in weeks. If anyone is in the greater Montreal area and wants to either hang out (and spare me from the task of reassuring my roommates that their fake id's will fool the bouncers at Café Campus) or take in some of the shows, let me know.

2. I got yet another new job. I wasn't feeling the not-for-profit, primarily due to the lack in profits. This new one will see me traversing the skies catering to skeezy business men from NYC to Thunderbay. Can we take a moment though to talk about the Uniforms?

Designed by Pink Tartan. Kim Newport-Mimran is a god.

3. Makeover shows on TLC make me cry.